What's happening to NHS dentistry?

I received a letter from my dentist this morning informing me that I will no longer receive NHS treatment from them from April 08. Apparently they have been attempting to negotiate a contract with the PCT but it was unsatisfactory so they have decided not to offer NHS treatment at all. That includes my teenage daughter, as they are only offering free treatment to kids aged 11 and under. I'm furious. It's a good thing I got the letter on a Saturday because I'd have been round there like a shot. They put some Denplan leaflets in the letter, informing me that I could get routine assessments and x rays for £12.80 a month, and I'd have to pay for anything else, such as fillings etc. Have you seen the prices??! Anyway, having done some research into dental insurance, this Denplan is a big rip off. Most other policies will pay 80% of routine treatment for about the same price. My dentist is only offering 20% discount on such treatments. It's really expensive anyway. I'm going to look into whether there are any NHS dentists in the area, even if they'll only take my daughter. If I don't have any luck then I'll just have to get her insured and I'll not have a dentist for a year. I cannot afford those prices while I'm still a student nurse. I need a tooth filling or pulling at this moment as well, could cost me more than £100!

I want some friends!

Lonely, lonely, lonely. I've finally got online having been without internet at home for what seems like forever, and all it's done is to remind me of how lonely I am. I'm going to give up on Facebook for now, it's a waste of time. Who needs a reminder of how few people I know?? Just makes me depressed. I seem to want to have my cake and eat it though. I like plenty of time to myself, but want more friends, and it doesn't work like that. Oh well, just having a gloomy do, we're all allowed every now and again!

Who'd be a nurse today?

I got really fed up a few days ago while reading the BBC Have Your Say comments. Nurses were getting such a bashing from so many people; apparently we are dirty, we don't care and we don't wash our hands. There were also complaints about not wanting to feed or wash people anymore because that is not part of our job. They are actually two tasks I really like to do. I like them because it gives me the chance to talk to people. Nurses do not spend as much time with their patients as they would like because there are so many other things to do, like all the jobs that doctors used to do. And when there are another 8+ patients to look after, all at different stages of their illness / hospital stay, and some who are really unwell, it leaves very little time to spend with each individual. I love my job, I have been a healthcare assistant for 9 years and a student nurse for 18 months. I know already that as a qualified nurse I will probably be demoralised by the lack of quality of care I can offer due to workload. I will often go home knowing I could have done a better job but for the paperwork I have had to complete and the work I have had to delegate to HCAs because I haven't had the time. It is often the work that I most enjoy as well. Why am I doing my training? Well, despite the relative low pay of nurses, it is a damn sight more than HCAs get, and as a single parent I cannot afford to live on the wages of an HCA indefinitely. Another reason is my desire to work abroad when my daughter is grown. Sad, but true.

October blues.

Do you ever get one of those really depressing, weird-type months? Doesn't even have to be a particular month, could be a day, week, year, whatever really. October has been one of those for me. I'm so glad it's almost over. I've started a new placement this month and have been getting into the swing of being back at work. That's bad enough after a few weeks off! The Mum of a close family friend has recently died, and it was a more drawn-out process than anyone would have liked, and that included the Mum that died. Funeral this week so have had to rearrange my off duty. I'm consequently working all day and evening tomorrow and most of Thursday so will be knackered. My parents have been away and my daughter and I have been staying at their house and we've just got back so getting used to being back at home again. I went out last night for the first time in months, that's certainly a break from the norm! Anyway, I just don't feel that I'm in any sort of routine right now. So, roll on November. I just want some sort of normality.

Shattered!

I only seem to write in this one when I'm fed up about something or other, so it's probably a good thing that I only write in it once or twice a month! There isn't really anything I'm particularly annoyed about right now so I'm just writing because I thought I should! It's just been the usual stuff that's been winding me up lately; the constant obsession with celebrity, having to get up at 5am every morning again (back on the wards!) and not having enough hours in the day to do everything I want to. I'm a bit fed up with feeling so tired when I get in from work because there are so many other things I want to do but can't because all I can do is collapse on the sofa when I get in! I think I need to address my diet, get into eating more high-energy, healthy food. Can't promise anything!

Stupid idiot

I feel like such a fool. I've wasted £30 I can ill afford to waste. I bought an ipod from Ebay and it's some weird foreign version with non-standard menus, non-standard connectors and a different clickwheel. There were no headphones with it (not initially a problem) but normal headphones don't fit in the socket. I feel like I'm going to cry. I've been so looking forward to getting this and the feeling of being let down is just awful. Doesn't help that it's that time of the month either and I'm in a certain amount of pain. It will teach me for being so greedy and wanting things I cannot afford. Very down on myself right now. Going through my "I'm a failure" routine again. I'm going to take Ebay off my favourites list. And all the other sites I buy things from. I'm stupid and greedy and sad. I need to concentrate on what's really important.

Jeremy Kyle

I watched it in the gym this morning. Relieves the boredom factor of the treadmill, and the earphones let people know that I don't want to talk to anyone. Anyway, I got to wondering why I watch Jeremy Kyle, enjoy it even! He's an annoying, sanctimonious little know-it-all who thinks that having a brother with addiction problems makes him an expert on human behaviour. The guests tend to be the worst examples of modern society who embarrass the rest of the human race by being so thick. Well, most of them; some of them have an ounce of sense, but then why would anyone want to air their dirty laundry in public? What makes someone want to do that? It's compulsive viewing though. I don't know if it's a superiority thing, or whether it's reassuring that I know that my life is actually fairly normal and drama-free. Makes me feel better about my situation though. I didn't bother watching Trisha afterwards. I was knackered, and I don't think they have channel 5.